An elderly woman went to see her doctor. She had been sick to her stomach for several days but didn't have a fever or any other symptoms of the flu.
After completing a few tests, the doctor returned to her exam room and, sitting her down, announced, "Mrs Jones, you are pregnant."
"Why, doctor, that can't be. I'm 87, and my husband is 94. There is no way, just no way!"
"It may seem impossible, but you are indeed pregnant."
"Can I please borrow a phone then?"
After dialing the number, she waited as it rang and rang. Finally, on the third try, a frail voice greeted, "hello?"
"You miserable bastard! you lying SON-OF-A-BITCH. You said we didn't need to use protection, you said there wasn't any risk. Well, asshole, I'm pregnant!"
Long pause.... several minutes go by...... "Who is this please?"
35 minutes ago