Saturday, February 28, 2015

A little morning humor

Shout out to all you amnesiacs out there... 
and I don't think you know who you are.

Because affluent white girls need gangs too.

I'm so badly in debt...
my bank now sends me a monthly understatement.
It's a dog-eat-dog world out there.
That's why I stay in here where it's a man-eat-donuts world.

Brain Freeze:
Legitimate issue or zombie treat?
Water Polo:
A sport that's just one shark away from being the best sport on the planet.
I wasn't planning on going for a run today...
but those cops came out of nowhere.
If I had a dollar...
for every girl that found me unattractive, they'd eventually find me attractive.

To make a long story short:
Hamlet: Everyone dies
Macbeth: Everyone dies
Titanic: Everyone dies
Twilight: You want to die

G: Nobody gets the girl.
PG: The good guy gets the girl.
R: The bad guy gets the girl.
X: Everybody gets the girl!

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