Jeff Dunham the early years?

I'm a Jeff Dunham fan. From Achmed to Bubba J, he pokes fun at every aspect of identity motivated people.
There is a story I heard though about his early days. I cannot confirm that it is true, but here goes.
Seems Jeff was scheduled to play a show in New Mexico. When the show bombed, He was stuck with out even so much as the money for a bus ticket home. Being young and enterprising though, he set off on foot for his parents home in Texas.
As he trudged across the south west, he happened to see a lone Indian on a horse tending a flock of sheep. Jeff decided to try his skills ,and maybe score at least a meal and a place to spend the night. He approached the herder, and after a few minutes of small talk, Jeff observed, "That's a sharp looking horse you have there, can he talk?"
Replied the Indian, "Horse no talk, horses no can speak..."
But Jeff continued, "hey there hoss, how's life? This here fella treat you good?"
And dang if the horse didn't reply, "Well sure, he treats me really well. He gives me a little grain every night, rubs me down regular, I have a nice corral to call home, and always plenty o grass to nibble on."
Well, the Indian sat there flabbergasted.
Jeff turned to the dog and said, " What about you, can you talk? Hows this old Indian treat you?"
The Indian said, "Dog no talk, dog no learn to speak..."
But just t that moment the dog rasped out, "Oh, this Indian treats me bad. he only gives me scraps from his dinner, throws stuff at me constantly, makes me run all day keeping the sheep. Its a terrible life, but I guess its better then being a stray."
The poor Indian was dumbfounded.
Jeff then asked, "What about the sheep? Can any of them talk?"
The Indian replied, "Sheep no talk, sheep no can... Sheep lie, sheep lie."

The Indian that told me this swears it true, everything but what the sheep said.

Only the Vikings.

Minnesota has sunk beyond low. They are doing things I never thought possible in football. First, Percy Harvin runs 104 yards and does not score. That alone is a shocker. To make matters worse, the vikings then fail to turn the best possible field position into a score.
They are the ultimate liberals of sports. They can take gold and turn it into turds. Heck, ObamAA+ must take lessons from these guys. A mishash of tallent but no leadership. A good look and zero net output. Million dollar babies, chump change results. These guys are the poster for what is wrong in our country.

Women are to be seen and not heard

At least that seems to be the message from the Dallas Cowboys head office. Cheerleader Melissa Kellerman got mowed down by tight end Jason Witten. Afterward she sent out several tweets letting her fans know in a humerous way that she was all right. She appears to be a classy lady. Dallas Cowboys owners on the other hand are not. They made her pull the plug on her twitter account.
So lets learn from this, if you agree that women are to be seen and not heard, show your support for the Cowboys. The rest of us want em to put thier little boy britches away and start acting like men and treat the women with the respect they deserve, having earned it. At this rate, I'll be cheering for the Eagles and ass clown Prick err Vick. Maybe I'll just leave the set off on the 24th.

Obama buddy sentenced

Tony Rezco has been sentenced to ten years in jail less time served on several corruption charges relating to the attempted sale of the senate seat vacated by ObamAA+. Not a peep from the media. Its not on the Yahoo front page, nor anywhere in their political section. Who says the media aint water carriers for the communists?
Does this resemble the White Water mess from Clintons days in office? Even now the media is not giving it the coverage it deserved, they still down play it. I guess corruption is only news when its a republican, with the dems its part of their resume.

Dumb ass judge gets it wrong

I don't think U.S. District Judge Kathryn Vratil has ever heard of the Constitution. She is damn sure clueless about what it says regarding searches and seizures. The federal government has made possession of large amounts of cash illegal in their war on drugs and war on terror. In doing so they violate the Constitution and the trust of the American people.
I have no doubt that the money seized from Eduardo Arencibia came from drugs or some other less then reputable source, the problem is there is no proof. We are supposedly a nation of laws with a Constitution as the supreme law of the land. Vratil chose to ignore that fact and issues summary judgement in favor of Barta and law enforcement run amok. Its time to take back our nation. We need to vote out crappy self serving politicians and install ones who will uphold the constitution, men and women who will impeach bad judges and send them packing. The Politicians we have now are owned by too many groups who serve themselves, not the people.
That's why I want people like Herman Cain or Sarah Palin over career politicians like Mitt Romney or even Newt Gingrich.

First Bitch booed

Out of respect for ObamAA+'s witch err wife, I capitalized the B, just so you know. Ain't it ironic? Miami is liberal lala land for Florida. It should be a haven for the wife of the worst president ever, but we are talking NASCAR fans, people who are proud of their country at any given moment of any given day of every week, not once in their lives. OK, some of the die hards are only proud of their country once, but it lasts 92 years and 22,000 gallons of prime Jack Daniels.
NASCAR fans are the heart of what America really is, independent spirits, devoted to GOD, family and country. They don't go for willy nilly politicians, and they dang sure don't like corrupt ones.
Blackie O was a fool if she thought she would get even a luke warm reception. She has earned the derision, I hope she is proud of that fact.
Is anybody shocked that the wounded vet who was with her got resounding applause? I'm not, True Americans are proud of their sons and daughters who serve, and would shake the hand of their worst enemy's son if he was a vet. Maybe the bitch should enlist and serve her country for a few years instead of milking her status as the worst lady. Maybe then people would think a little better of her. Until then, she can trot her fat ass back to Martha's Vineyard and the bastions of the Kennedy dynasty. Or is that Die Nasty? Ted the swimmer died an unrepentant murderer.

Justice for Matthew

Brandon Wilson beat the executioner. He hung himself in his death row cell. Good Riddence! Bleeding heart losers claim that we must protect those who are in the custody of the state. I say bull shit. Brandon put himself through a worse death then the state was proposing to. He only eliminated the cruel lengthy stay in a tiny cell that was to be his home for another thirty years. Mexifornia has a huge death row population. Bleeding heart loser judges keep the number of executions at a snails pace. Since the death penalty was reinstated. California has executed just thirteen scum bags. Ninteen took the express lane, and a whopping 54 died of natural causes. Crap! If they are going to die from natural causes, lets make it a real natural one, a hungery mountain lion or rabid coyote. California taxpayers house 719 pieces of shit and pay for their endless pile of appeals.
Equip every cell with a sturdy eye bolt. Give every prisoner a stout belt. Suicide watch should consist of a pile of video cameras, and plenty of popcorn peanuts and beer for the observers. Record it all for the families of the victims, then play music, no, blare music that would drive them to end their lives.

Older not wiser.

People are supposed to get smarter with age, but that clearly is not the case with Dorli Rainey an activist agitator from the Seattle area. 84 years old, 4 ft 10, and she thought she could get away with anything because she is old and looks frail? I'm glad the cops sprayed her. better that then attempting to manhandle her and risking injury to her, or tazing her into a heart attack. The woman deserves something for her efforts though. maybe Denny can put her up for AOTW.
The OWS crowd are low life trash. Whinny kids who got degrees in uselessness and are complaining that the bankers who paid for it want their money repaid just like every other student does.

I have done the unforgivable

Sigh. After living in Kansas for twenty nine years and eleven months, I today, cheered for Nebraska.
I know that in Mildcat territory this is considered a capital offense, Yet after years of cheering for Paterno's team, I can no longer applaud the nitwit lions. Glad the deserters won.
For Jerry Sandusky, lets hope the move from Penn State to State Pen is swift, his tenure is long, and his punishment fitting.

Thanks Vets

Balls

1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.


2 The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING.

3 The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.

4 The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.

5 The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.

And....

6 The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.
THE AMAZING CONCLUSION:
The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

There must be a ton of people in Washington playing MARBLES!

My conclusion? The folks in Washington all LOST their marbles.

Paterno Fired

The uberlong term coach of the Nittany Lions has been terminated due to the child molestation scandal that is shaking Penn State like a Malasian earth quake. Expect to see a great college football program in ruins because he chose to look the other way. The lives of countless young boys have been ruined by this. Molestation is called the crime of the centuries because so many of the victims go on to become perpetrators of it as well. The Pashtun culture, in fact a lot of islam is riddled with child molesters. We have sick groups like NAMBLA advocating for molesters rights. As the nation moves toward acceptance of homosexuality, and granting them rights, the child molesters are knocking on the door demanding their fair shake. Sickos at at least one Occupy rally were demanding rights for beastiality, another sickness.
As for Joe, the board was kind when they terminated him, he should have lost his retirement, and the bust of him that adorns the university stadium should be crushed. He should be prosecuted for his silence. He was informed, he knew what was happening, yet he turned a blind eye. He is as guilty as the molester.

Now its off the scale

It looks like another TANG memo sort of thing. AP now reports that one of the accusers who settled with Cain when he was at the NRA later filed complaints at her next job with immigration. Given the size of her settlement, a mere $45,000, her later filing a similar complaint at her next job, and the whole feel of this, it looks like some one is deathly afraid of a black GOP candidate. Whether that is establishment republicans or ObamAA+ remains to be seen. Probably a combination of the two, dems fear true conservatives. They want another McRino for our candidate.
Much more of this, and I'll need a new Bull Shit meter.

My Bull Shit meter is pegged

It may well turn out that Cain is indeed a sexual predator, but I want proof. Gloria All(commie)red is the liar err lawyer for Ms Bialek. Now I read this. I want proof or the LSM can just STFU. When they report on ObamAA+ with half the intensity they expend on conservatives, I will pay attention to them.
There is a story from the Vietnam war about a commander who was due for an Officer Evaluation Report. he had been a fine commander, but as his supperior was in the process of making the report, word arrived that he might have been involved in an atroscity akin to Mi Lai. The evaluating officer when to his Co for advice, it went something like this;
Col "what kind of Officer is he?"
Maj "Very efficient."
Col "Then make the report that he is a very efficient officer."
Maj "But what if the reports that he murdered civilians is true?"
Col "Then we will report him next time as having been a very efficeint killer."

The media has expended a lot of effort, and all their credibility lynching conservatives. They seem some how blind to the fact that communist regimes tend to hang the teachers and imprison the reporters.

Ron Paul wins Illinois Straw Poll

With 52% of the vote, it looks like Ron Paul may be a serious contender after all. Until you look at the break down, 8% of those cast in person, and 66.5 of those on the internet. Paulinians are still up to their same old steaming bag of dog shit. These people are lower then the OWS crowd. more likely, they are part of them. To vote, all that was needed was a $5 contribution. My bet is that a big chunk of the internet vote will be fake credit card data. I seem to remember that happening a time or two before.
Ron has a few good ideas, he would make a great chairman of the fed, or Secretary of the Treasury. We cannot take him seriously though when his followers game so many on line polls.
Romney won 35%, and Cain won 29% of the in person votes. What needs to be done is scrap all the on line Paul votes, then analize the data. The sexual harassment suit hanging over Cain is hurting him. It needs a full public airing so folks can see whether or not he is Bill Clinton lite. My bet is the suit is a bunch of bullshit, and we need to move forward and leave it to rot in the ditch. If it is real, a full airing will help voters decide. people make mistakes. Much of what Clinton did is in the who cares catergory, Its the ones who claim it was unwanted from the gitgo I care about, not the Monica's. Seriously, with a wife like Hildabeast, who can blame the poor guy?

Concealed Carry on the rise in Topeka

The Crap Journal reports an increase in concealede carry applications for the year.
The journal notes: Sheriff’s Sgt. Todd Good said some applicants have mentioned home invasions or being victims of crimes as reasons for their decision to apply for concealed-carry permits. However, he said he doesn’t know if that is the reason for such a large increase.
“Obiously they don’t need a permit to have a gun in their home, but I’m not sure if they realize that or not,” he said.
What Sgt Good misses is that a gun on the night stand is of little use when you walk in on thugs in your living room. I would much rather the gun be with me then at home where they can grab it.

Adding insult

Just shocking! Some of the traders at the Chicago Board of Trade decided to have a little fun with the homeless Occupying their side walks. They dumped employment applications on them. The applications were for McDonald's. I'm sure most of you recall that McDonald's had a hiring day a few months ago and added more jobs then the stimuless has. You can bet your bottom dollar that the geeks and freaks of Occupy have already filled one out. And been rejected.
Guys, that was mean. Some one could get hurt like that. I know my sides are still aching from laughing at it. Bet I'm not the only one.

Muslims at it again in France

Well, I am just shocked! A French magazine mocked the pedophile Mohammed, and their office burned to the ground. Amazing coincidence! or not. The scum bags of that sick cult known as islam are intolerant, therefore we also should be intolerant.
We need to quit molly coddling them, if they break the law, no Halal meals, force feed em pork, and if they murder some one, wrap their sorry ass in a pigs carcass and shoot em.
islam is not a religion, it is a sick perverted cult. I have more respect for Jim Jones' followers, or the heavens gate bunch then I do for any muslim. If ever a sorry bunch needed to be removed from the face of the planet, islam is it.

feeling sorry for the OWSers

Saw one today that touched my heart. Poor girl has her degree in womens studies, and can't find a job. To top it off, she wouldn't be able to make it as the night deposit box at a sperm bank. Almost wasted a tear on her.