Saturday, August 31, 2013

Saturday low information voter joke

A low information voter was having a lot of difficulty in French class. To encourage him, his teacher said, "You'll know you're really beginning to get it when you start dreaming in French."

The low information voter ran into class all excited one day, saying, "Teacher, teacher! I had a dream last night and everyone was talking in French!"

"Great!" said the teacher; "what were they saying?"

"I don't know," the low information voter replied; "I couldn't understand a word they were saying." Then he went to a support Hillary rally.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Whaddamaroon

Obungler is set to attack Syria. They pose no threat to the United States. The war there is between Alquaida and the Syrian regime. Neither is a good group. We have no interests in Syria at this time.
The only reason I can see for any attack on Syria would be to prevent WMDs falling into the hands of the terrorists. If some thug leader wants to use chemical weapons on his own people, what is that to us? ( OK, mooslimes, a good thing.)
The Constitution gives the power to declre war to congress. Congress could turn Obambi on his ear by declaring war on the islamist faction who are in Syria. That would put a crimp in the ass holes style. Instead, we have Obozo, once again, making war with OUR military, and without authorization. At least Hitler had his puppet Reichstag give him the power to attack Poland. I guess we can cross Hitler analogies off our list of disses to piss off libtards, Barry is much much worse.
My take? Since several groups have threatened to attack Israel if we do anything to Syria, this may be his way of assaulting GOD's chosen people. May he fail.

A little morning humor


Thursday, August 29, 2013

My kind of kids book

Are you fed up with the way our schools spoon feed garbage to kids? are you tired of all the lame excuses the media makes for islamofascists? Do you want your children or grand children to know the truth about these terrorist scum, Here is a starting point. This will give your kids something to work on while also feeding them the truth like no public school would ever dare. We just need to let them know that their president book needs a correction, ObamAA- is an imposter.

A little morning humor


Alex Rodriguez never gets clutch hits in October, yet his fans insist on comparing him to Babe Ruth.

So A-Rod tries to get as close as he can to Ruth-type achievements.

Before the playoffs last year, A-Rod went to a hospital and promised a dying kid that he'd ground out to second base for him.

And I was at the game, people, it's true - A-Rod pointed to second base.


For anyone who cares, I'm no longer a baseball fan. I have followed the doping scandals with little interest. These guys are supposed to be role models for our kids. Any wonder we have fucked up kids. It goes deeper then that though, much deeper.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Scary stuff

A teen in Minnesota was attacked by a wolf while camping with friends. The attack happened by Lake Winnibigoshish early Saturday. The teen was part of a group of four who had camped out at the lake.
Wolves and Coyotes are members of the dog family. They can readily interbreed, so in my book, they are the same species. Their genetics does not lend well to domestication, much like pitbulls and Rottweilers. Its in their DNA.
Authorities are waiting on test results to determine whether a 75 lb wolf killed near the camp is the same one that attacked Noah Graham. Minnesota and several other northeren states have gone to great lengths to reintroduce wolves into areas where they were erradicated to protect livestock and people. I guess the liberals at the Sierra Club and PETA are slow learners. We need to get rid of these animals before they cause serious harm. Oh, and the wolves should go as well.

A little morning humor

I never liked Eliot Spitzer until he got busted with a hooker.

Then I was sorry to see him leave office.

I felt like there was finally someone in the government who represented my interests.


Tuesday, August 27, 2013

was asked to leave Walmart today

Apparently, walking up to kids wearing K-State purple shirts, and telling them that the M is upside down is frowned upon in that establishment. Tomorrow, Hy-Vee.

Not bored, no way

In part, I agree with Dr Ablow, the Oklahoma assassins did not do it out of boredom. People who are bored go to the pool, they do crazy stuff and post it on You-tube. I do however disagree with him that it is some mental condition for which they are not responsible. We all know right from wrong. We all understand that stealing is wrong, that adultery is wrong, that murder is wrong. Even the most seriously disturbed know it. That is why people like Adam Lanza take their own life after they go on a rampage.
Dr Ablow is making excuses for their evil. We are not all goody twp shoes. In fact, none of us are. the human race is inherently evil. Sure, we point with disgust at Hitler, Stalin, Mao, and others. We cringe at the thought of a Stark or a Dahlmer living next door, but that does not make any of us good. People do what they think they can get away with.
These three thugs thought they would get away with murder. They were young and stupid. They did not cover their tracks, they did not ensure there were no witnesses, they were idiots.
They did not attack Chris Lane because they had lost their humanity, they did it out of hate. When we send soldiers to war, we don't deprive them of their humanity, we teach them to hate. To hate the taliban, to hate communism, to hate nazism, imperialism, and every thing we have stood against since Cain slew Abel. Hate is a very human emotion. Most animals kill for food, or to protect something. We do it out of a feeling of hate.
Now we have expanded the lunacy with the term hate crimes. So ya thank murders happen over LOVE? How dumb are our politicians? Seriously? Chris Lane is no less dead then scumbag Martin.
Lets not give these assholes a break because of some misguided belief that they are victims. its bad enough they won't face the needle. They deserve it and more.

A little morning humor

My wife wanted one of those big-screen TVs for her birthday.

I just moved her chair closer to the one we already have.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Beyond sick

Life is cheap in certain segments of America. When one of my fellow bloggers pointed out the week end travesty in Baltimore, my attention was captured by an article at the bottom of the page. How cheap is life in Baltimore? Try five bucks. William Monroe and Meghan Kerrigan

were murdered by Melville Mason for a lousy ten dollars. Two other room mates were wounded in the assault. Its a grim story, one fitting for a third world hell hole, not a city in close proximity to our nations Crap hole err Capital.

Can it get any worse? Well, yes, yes it can.

Court records show that officers responding to the scene inside a home in the 1200 block of S. Carey St. found Kerrigan’s one-year-old daughter, who was unharmed, sitting next to her body, patting her on the back.

I am sick. Thank you Martin O’Malley. You retard! You contribute to the problem when pieces of trash like Mason can slaughter a babies parents with no fear of having to pay for his horrific crime.

On a final note, Mason is black, his victims were white. Tell me again how there is no race war in America.

2013 Obunglers America

I see a race war coming, and its not because of hard working whites or even the skin heads and KKK.. We created a great society that isn’t great at all. With the destruction of the black family as a unit, we now have people living on entitlements who have never held a job, and in most cases, out side of teachers and police and others with whom they must interact, know no one who has a job. Is that a stretch? When working, or doing well in school is derided as acting white, its not.

The low lifes have been allowed to fail so much and so often they cannot be productive members of society. We don't have any inflation, or so sayeth the goverment types, yet prices are rising, driven by fuel costs. Electricity is going up, food, fuel, but not welfare payments, or disability, or what ever they call the bribes for the democrap voting trash. You can feel the unrest. They can't buy their food and enough Bud light to last a month, so it has to be whity's fault.

The violence escalates in Chicago, then Baltimore, next Atlanta, then Dallas or Los Angeles. Its a slow ramping up, and since the media is playing songs for Obungler, no one is getting the word until the hood comes to your neighborhood. Since most law-abiding urban and suburbanites are lightly armed, maybe a good knife, its gonna spell trouble. Right now they are going after mostly older and easy victims, because there are plenty of George Zimmermans out there, people who are vigilant, armed, and while maybe not ready mentally for a fight, capable of fighting.

Its like what we did in the Pacific, first we took the fight to Guadalcanal, and our Marines and soldiers got some experience. We hit where they were weak so we could build strength, and that is how the menace here is conducting the battle. They are not gonna attack some one like me, armed to the teeth, a big guy in good physical shape, or at least, that's how I appear, no cane, no walker. I think the guy in Oklahoma was some what of an aberration to the norm. Had they come at him to his face, he would have had a fighting chance, and even though there were three, and armed, he just might have won.

We have black liberation preachers spewing hate from the pulpits, we have black rights people who only want to exploit the problem, not fix it, and we have black hate sites proclaiming that whity must die.

The only gem in the whole deal is that they are acting like mooslimes and killing each other more so then they are attacking whites. Sadly, while a lot of their victims are fellow gang members, quite a few innocent children are slaughtered as well, and also a number of people who were striving to rise above the swamp and become productive Americans.

We are under attack, and we don’t know it, or don’t care. Its not crime anymore, its race war. When a 99 year old woman is murdered in her home, when an 88 year old veteran is beaten to death in a parking lot, its not mere crime. We are Libya today, and the escalation is all around us.

There’s a gun and ammunition just inside the door way. Use it only in emergency.

What else can I say? Be sober, be vigilant.

A little morning humor

I took nine years of French, but I can't remember any of it.

I realized on the plane ride over that if someone doesn't ask me what color my hat is, I'll have nothing to talk about for two weeks.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

A little morning humor

Over heard at the mall:
I don't wear vanilla-scented lotion or perfume. Most girls love that crap, but I can't do it. 'Cause I can't be the fat girl that smells like Rice Krispie treats. Can't do it. People are all like, "God, Desiree! Did you eat again?!"

Saturday, August 24, 2013

The epic fail of socialism

We all are aware that every place socialism has been tried it has failed. Now the Rat Bastard Commies aka the democrat party want more of it here. We've had enough of it. Look at the results we have thus far. The experiment called hte great society has given us the culture of violence we are enduring today.
In every major city there are areas of blight directly associated with the welfare state. Landlords who cater to subsidised tenants do not get the money that working families can pay. Its a steady income flow, welfare rats tend to not move until the place is destroyed, and that can take years if not decades of neglect. When one property in a neighborhood declines, the good neighbors who can do nothing about the blight move out. People more accepting move in, and the slide continues.
Where am I going with this? Lets look at cities like Chicago and Detroit. Detroit is dozer ready, all we need are a few of the IDF's armored D-9s, and we can convert it back into farm ground. Contaminated farm ground. Huge swaths of the city are abandoned, the lowest forms of scum have moved in. No, not the bums, mooslimes. (sorry, couldn't resist the cheap shot, back to being serious).
Crime has soared there and in Chicago. Crime is skyrocketing, and ordinary citizens are denied the basic right to defend themselves.
Yup, a socialist utopia. Make that an Eewtopia. For much of the last few decades, we have not heard much about the crime rates there. Last year though, and again this year, the subject of black violence has crept into the national conversation in spite of the liberal media attempts to squash it.
Since the failure of the attempted lynching of George Zimmerman for successfully defending himself, we have seen a rash of reports of violence by black youths diected at whites, and a cacopheny of screams from the liberal civic leaders claiming it just aint so and we are racist for saying it.
Fine, I'm a racist. There, I said it, happy? I'm not. That the majority of the people comitting these crimes are black has nothig to do with the color of their skin, rather it has everything to do with the destruction of hte black family. Many black kids are being raised in homes with no father. They will have a mom, or often a grandmother raising them, but dad has been drive out of hte picture by the lure of welfare dollars. They might have a psudeo uncle or two arround, but these are not men who impart a work ethic in these children. They are caught in the machine, they can look out and see wealth, but they cannot reach out and grasp it. Lyndon Baines Johnson got them. LBJ was a racist, and with the welfare reform he called his great society, he sounded the death knell of the black family. And still they blindly vote for these communists.
We look ot at countries like Russia and east Germany and see what communism wrought, but we are in for far worse, and we might very well be destroyed by it.
What would have happened if we had followed GODs laws? Instead of welfare, make every recipient work for their food and board. Had the government demanded just a few hours of labor for the hand outs, we could have accomplished so much more. St. paul said "If they won't work, don't feed them."
What if we forced fathers to support their children? Certainly Teddy Kennedy and his fellow politicians fatherd a few woods colts, but not the millions they repeatedly voted to support with welfare. If every single mother had been required to submit a list of the candidates for father, and blood tests had been performed, and AND those fathers had been made to pony up, think how many tax dollars we wouldn't be paying back to China. If we also had told those dads they WOULD be required to spend ten hours a week with those kids, think of the impact that would have made. Those women would have been running to hte abortion mills.
Maybe, but that is another mistake that links back to LBJ and his Supreme Injustices of the Court. Are you aware that one of his nominations to the court was flilabustered? you say the republicans didn't have the power in the 60's to do that, AND YOU ARE RIGHT. it was done by his own democrats, Even they couldn't handle the stench back then. Well, it didn't get any better, and after a few years of living with hogs, well, you just don't notice the stink.
Abortion is another disaster we have allowed to happen. Yes, we allowed it. if we had ousted the members of hte senate nad house who supported it, or were lackluster, at every chance, we could have then impeached the court.
Speaking of the courts, one big mistake we made there is allowing liares err lawyers to be judges. They are trained in every aspect of the constitution, not to respect it, but how to kneecap it. Our Constitution should be the third rail of politics. Touch it, brush it even lightly, and you are gonna pay a dear price. Frankly, I wouldn't allow attornies to be in the elected chair of district attorney, or ttorney General. The job of being the prosecutor should be rotated between all alwyers in each region.. If a Liar practices in Lawrnce and Topeka, he can be made to serve as prosecuting attorney in both, and if he intentionally throws a case, he is disbarred. hell, make the losing lawyer be suspended for thirty days unless he is pleading a guilty man guilty. Both sides are o nthe government payroll 99% of the time anyway, might as well make em work for it. Gladiators of the 21st century! Hell, it could get as entertaining as "From the Hip".
Abortion was wrong, it never should have been legalized, and it, just like welfare, was aimed squarely at black America.
The failure of black America is not a victory for white America. This is not liek a race between a Chevy and a Dodge on a dusty country road where you can laugh in glee as your opponent splaters himself into the elm tree by the bridge. No, Americans of all colors are bonded together in this industrail machine we call America. We are like a mighty motor with many cylinders. When one of those cylinders isn't firing, or is not firing to full potentail, it slows down the machine. In a truck that means less torque, slower acceleration, and more fuel wasted to get from point A to point B. If, instead of knee capping 10% of America, LBJ and his evil minions had looked to empower them in the way Martin Luther King Jr wanted, We would be vastly wealthier then we are now. Instead of tenaments, and second rate rentals, blacks would be proud owners, doers, movers and shakers. Thats what the democrats of 1960's America feared. blacks as equals.
So are they quaking at having a black president? Not hardly. They picked the man for the job, and they were careful to select an afirmative action kind of guy. We call him a post turtle, and that is what they wanted, a leader who has to be led, a blind man driving the bus. As his presidency winds down, they wil lquietly point to his failings, from obamacare to solyndra, his string of dismal failures will be their laundry list of reasons why black men should not be president. It will impact every black politician with aspirations just like it did with black NCOs in the military, and workers in industry. I saw it too many times where a good black candidate was washed early in hte selectio nprocess, and a mediocre to lousy one was promoted into the slot. On a percentage bsis, there are as many well qualified blacks as there are white or asians in America, and as many lousy ones as well.
If the black community had been empowered in 1964 instead of trapped like wild hogs, think what America would look like today. Just in simplestterms, we are talking about a 20% diffrence in productivity and creativity, but I truly believe the numbers would have been far greater.
Oh what we could have become. Instead, we have "bored" black youth playing beat whity on the streets, at the fairs, and all over America. Its not to late to stop, but we wo'nt. The black grevience industry won't allow it, nd neither will the racists of the democrat communist party.
Wish you all a good week end, and keep a close watch. We know not the hour nor the day, but we know the what. GOD bless you all.

Saturday blonde joke

I had a bully as a kid. He was blonde, so he used to stick "Me Kick" signs on my back.

Then everyone thought I was the bully - with bad grammar and the courtesy to give a heads up.


Yes, lame. but its free!!!


Friday, August 23, 2013

A little morning humor

My mom says to me, "Honey, I don't want you to think I have diabetes because I'm fat. I have diabetes because it runs in our family."

I said, "No, mom, you have diabetes because no one in our family runs!"

Thursday, August 22, 2013

A little morning humor

Almost all serial killers are men.

That's 'cause women like to kill one man slowly over many, many years.


Wednesday, August 21, 2013

How I feel toward Obomunists.



OhCrap, I ran out of jokes! time to shut down the blog

Or not. My next sacrifice on the alter of bad humor. I usually keep then scheduled a few weeks out, but with recovery from surgery, I've gotten out of step.

My girlfriend said, "I hate it when you finish my sentences."

So I said, "Period."

You can't trust government? Whoda thunk it

The Supreme Soviet in Kakakistan, aka Mexifornia has ruled tax breaks offered to small businesses to start in California are unconstitutional. That ruling happened in December, and now the Tax Franchise Board wants their money. Not the boards money, the small business owners.

This is typical communist fare. The owners who believed the government were foolish, maybe a bit hopeful, but in hind site, foolish. Businesses have been fleeing the left coast idiocy in droves for more than a decade. The communists, and the low information voters don't get it. California is approaching a tipping point. They mat be past it. They do not have enough workers to sustain the sheer number of sick lame and lazy, mostly lazy, that infest the state.

The down side for the rest of us, is that there are no immigration laws governing people moving from a state destroyed by liberalism, to a fresh host. Red States beware! You are soon to be invaded by a swarm of human fleas. Its happening in Texas, Colorado has been over run. Red states need to pass Constitutional amendments limiting taxes, and criminalizing the type of governmental behavior that transpired in California. Each of the states needs to pass a Constitutional amendment limiting taxes to 10% of gross income. Make that applicable to every entity below state level, a cap of 10%. they also need to pass an amendment capping feral spending to 10% of GDP. Once 34 states pass it, we have a new Constitutional Amendment, and we desperately need it. Write the amendment such that entitlement spending gets slashed first. Require that spending cuts be evenly distributed across the board, so we don't have the pResident undermining the military to fund his hand outs to foreign pets like Egypt.

As for this current mess, I guess the communist czars in California's courts have never heard of an ex post facto law. Maybe we should pass a bill of attainder declaring them guilty of theft... Or treason.

The idiots who stay in California deserve what they are getting. I strongly urge anyone there who is halfway sane to get out, and get out NOW. Things like this make me wish terrorists had attacked San Franfreakshow and Lost Anysense instead of New York and Washington. Then again, they were all liberal hell holes. And no, I'm not implying that anyone deserved 9-11-01. (Cept maybe a certain black liberation theology preacher and certain members of his flock.)



Monday, August 19, 2013

A little morning humor

What goes clip clap, clip clap, clip clap bang………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. Amish Drive By.

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Is Kaitlyn Hunt a criminal or just a pervert?

R.S. McCain has been covering a story in Florida about two school students, one a senior, the other a freshman who became sexually involved. They met through the school basketball program, and ended up in a relationship, a lesbian relationship.

My attitude on homosexuality is that it is wrong. GOD condemns it, and I accept his judgment. I don't believe any one is born gay. Sure, there are a lot of happy babies, but they are not perverts by nature. this is a perversion!

Kate got arrested because of the age of her sex partner. A fourteen year old can have sex with another fourteen year old, and that's OK. When their sex partner is eighteen or over, its a crime. If this had been a teacher, or an authority figure, I'd be inclined to agree with prosecution, but with it being a team mate, I am less so.

Only a hundred years ago, girls of fourteen were getting married. an eighteen year old was looked on as a spinster, and a maiden of twenty five was an old maid. Those girls weren't getting hitched to fourteen year olds either. They were marrying men who were closer to thirty, men who had established jobs, income, and stability. Frankly, I'd rather see teenagers having relationships with men who can support them than with boys who cannot, but I'd much rather see them keeping their legs together.

Our society is a disaster. We call perversions diversity and choice. We have children bearing children, and only one of them raising that child. Our nuclear family has disintegrated, and things that are abundantly wrong are called normal.

Kaitlyn Hunt is a product of this society. She is experimenting with lesbianism, and may well spend her life in that rut. She was an aspiring athlete and cheerleader. Its a strange commentary that so many women who are into sports are caught in that life. It is another problem with our society.

Kate has had repeated contact with her "victim". That the "victim" is not the reporter indicated that this might be a case of twisted lust. The infatuation might be mutual.

At this point in time, I don't agree with prosecuting Kate. We need to fix a lot of problems in our society, problems that make this a question of age rather then morality.

The school I attended was a K-12. Relationships between seniors and freshmen happened. Hell, relations between seniors and seventh graders happened too. We had girls as young as eleven get pregnant, not by a senior though, her baby daddy was in her class. Its not a new phenomenon, it was going on when my mother was a kid, and while grandma never talked about it, you can bet it was happening back then as well. Frankly, you can read about it in the Bible, so it was happening back then.

We have codified and criminalized so much of human behavior. We have lost perspective. I remember a story from a few years back about a man who was called to be an expert witness. The prosecution, in researching him for something to impeach with found that he had once been convicted of having sex with a minor. They asked him about it on the stand. he acknowledged he had indeed had sex with an underage girl. The prosecutor then asked if he was aware of what that girl had gone through in life as a result. The witness told him, ask her yourself, she is sitting right there, she drove me here, and we have been married for forty years.

The bottom line for me is that all things need to be viewed in perspective, something zero tolerance laws do not allow. When the "victim" is a willing participant, driven by adolescent hormones, its a far different story then when it is a child coerced and molested, an unwilling victim.

I was once the kid having sex with a much older woman. I was not the victim. Should she have been prosecuted for consenting to the desires of a kid six years her junior? In all honesty, when I met her, I thought she was younger, and she thought I was older. That shouldn't make it a crime.

We have millions of marriages in this country where one spouse is much older. I've met couples with forty year spans between them. They were adults when they met.

Yes, we need to protect children from predators, and we some times need to protect them from themselves. But above all, we need to fix what is wrong with our society where people are more concerned with the age variable then the fact that it is perverse sex. GOD said that in the last days, we would become like Sodom and Gomorah. Welcome to the last days where women give up what is natural and seek that which is unnatural.

A little morning humor

A priest dies and is waiting in line at the  Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket, and jeans. Saint Peter addresses this cool guy "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven?" The guy replies "I'm Jack, retired airline pilot from Houston".

Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the pilot "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom". The pilot goes into Heaven with his robe and staff.

Next, it's the priest's turn. He stands erect and booms out "I am Father Bob, pastor of Saint Mary's for the last 43 years". Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the priest "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom.

"Just a minute" says the good father. "That man was a pilot and he gets a silken robe and golden staff and I get only cotton and wood. How can this be?" "Up here we go by results" says Saint Peter. "When you preached, people slept. When he flew, people prayed".

Saturday, August 17, 2013

Saturday blonde joke

A Rolls Royce pulls up in to an expensive restaurant. A blonde emerges, followed by a harem of women and a rooster. After ordering for himself and his harem, the blonde requests a basket of apples for the rooster. The rooster proceeds to eats three baskets of apples. The waiter asks the blonde about the voracious appetite of the rooster. The blonde explains "A genie granted me three wishes. My first wish was to have an endless supply of money. My second wish was to have many beautiful women. And my third wish was to have an insatiable cock".

Friday, August 16, 2013

A little morning humor

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it, but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car.

The driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead. The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A beautiful blonde woman driving down the highway sees the man crying on the side of the road and pulls over. She steps out of her car and asks the man what's wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explains,"I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it."

The blonde says, "Don't worry."

She runs to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit. The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the road.

Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again, he hops down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished. He runs over to the woman and demands, "What is in that can? What did you spray on that rabbit!?"

The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the label. It says...

Hair Spray — Restores life to dead hair, and adds permanent wave.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Word for the Day

Nymphomaniac
A man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does.

Do they really exist?

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

A little morning humor

Does anyone know why baby diapers are called Luvs & Huggies while old people diapers are called Depends?
Cause if a baby shits in his pants, you are still gonna Luv'em & Hug'em.
If an old person shits in their pants, will they still be Luv'ed or Hugged? That "Depends" on if your ass is in the Will or not.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Monday, August 12, 2013

I'll remember Ember

Back in October of 2010, I told about finding a kitten after a grass fire. Well, that kitten turned out to be one UNFRIENDLY cat. If anyone attempted to pick her up, or pet her, they got clawed. She was sociable in a way, but she just didn't like to be handled. The one exception was the daughter of a friend. His kids named her Ember. A fitting name for a fire survivor, and it really fit her personality. Serenity was the only one who could hold or pet her. They just had a bond.
She also refused to be litter box trained, so eventually she became an outdoor cat. She was a good hunter. She disappeared last week. I am assuming that either a coyote or an owl got her. As persnickity as she was, I really liked her. She had several litters of kittens, and none of them had her temper. They were always cute little fluff balls, and therefore easy to adopt out. She left behind a litter. I found them under a trailer. Roughly three weeks old, just starting to eat solid food.
I lose two or three cats a year from my outdoor bunch. She is one of hte few I was really attached to.

A little morning humor

About five years ago the battery in my beat-up VW Beetle had died because I left the lights on overnight. I was in a hurry to get to work on time so I ran into the house to get my wife to give me a hand to start the car. I told her to get into our second car, a prehistoric oversized gas guzzler, and use it to push my

car fast enough to start it. I pointed out to her that because the VW had an automatic transmission, it needed to be pushed at least 30 mph for it to start.

She said fine, hoped into her car and drove off.

I sat there fuming wondering what she could

be doing.

A minute passed by and when I saw her in the

rearview mirror coming at me at about 40 mph, I

realized that I should have been a bit clearer with my directions.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

yup

The only surplus we are getting from this adminustration is politicians and burrocraps

.

A little morning humor

The testicles of a Newfoundland midget hurt and ached almost all the time so off he went to the Doctor.

The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would have a look. He stood the midget up onto the examining table and started to examine him. The doctor put one finger under his left testicle and told the midget to turn his head and cough, the usual method to check for a hernia.

"Aha!" mumbled the doctor. He then put his finger under the right testicle and asked the midget to cough again. "Aha!" said the doctor again as he reached for his surgical scissors.

Snip-snip-snip-snip on the right side... then snip-snip-snip-snip on the left side.

The midget was so scared he was afraid to look but couldn't believe that the snipping didn't hurt!

The doctor then told the midget to walk around the examining room to see how his testicles felt now. The midget was absolutely delighted as he walked around and discovered his 'boys' were no longer aching.

The doctor asked "How does that feel now?" The midget said "Perfect Doc. I didn't even feel it. What did you do? The doctor said: "I cut two inches off the top of your rubber boots".

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Saturday low information voter joke

Mom walked into the bathroom one day and found  her low information voter son furiously scrubbing his dick with a toothbrush and toothpaste.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, young man?!" she exclaimed.
"Don't try to stop me!" He warned. "I'm gonna do this three times a day, because there's no way I'm gonna get a cavity that looks and smells as bad as my sister's."

Saturday blonde joke


A blonde  was visiting her niece last night and asked if she could borrow a newspaper.

"This is the 21st century," she said. "I don't waste money on newspapers. Here, you may borrow my iPad."

I can tell you this. That bloody fly never knew what hit him.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

A little morning humor

Accordion to a recent scientific survey,  replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Revelation: Where are we?

I was talking with my eldest brother last night, and that is the question he posed to me. As those of you who read my rantings regularly know, I am one who believes we are in the last days, the quickening if you will that Jesus spoke of to his Disciples.

Are we at the first seal? Are we past the fourth? We want to put GOD’s terms into our picture frame, and we just cannot do that. A GOD who can make the entire universe in six days, cannot fit into our comprehension, no matter how we try. Ours is a box GOD will not fit into. Scientists want us to believe the world and universe are billions if not trillions of years old. Some want to say it had no beginning as they deny the existence of their creator. I am a young earth creationist. yes, there are stars we can see that are many thousands of light years away, but the creator who made them can make that light shine in an instant, if he can make it in four days. And why did he take three days if he is all powerful? He made it perfect, he took his time. We don't live in a perfect world, we and our ancestors defiled it, and that brings us now to the twilight of the era of man.

We want to understand it on our terms. Christians were for a time called flat earthers. People got that notion from the Bible. How? Revelation teaches that when Jesus returns, all the earth will be able to see. it. In an era before television and satellite transmissions, before one could see the events half a world away as they unfold, the only logical solution was a flat earth, and all the perils that came with it.

Again, we wanted to put GOD into our box. He just doesn't fit! Jesus said there would be wars and rumors of wars. Well, we have had that for the last 150 years! Not much changing, but then again, Jesus likened it to the end of a pregnancy where the abortionists knife cuts the baby.... Oh wait, he spoke of natural delivery where the onset of labor is gradual, a tightening here, a contraction there. signs that a woman alone in the world might not understand with out a physician, midwife, or close friend or mother to help her understand. So gradual, you would not notice, and might give birth in a toilet because you did not know the signs. it happens!

If we compare 2013 to 2012, nothing much has changed. Much! how about 2013 to 2003? if you think about it, you see the changes. then again, how about compared to 1973? That's ancient history! If you had left earth in 1973 in a rocket, and returned today, you would not know America! Hell, you wouldn't know Europe, Australia, and you damn sure wouldn't know Russia. North Korea? Meh.

So where are we? If the one on the white horse has come, who was he? Need it be a he? Might it be a nation? We once were a righteous nation, composed of people who feared the Lord? I do not know. I am woefully ignorant. The second seal, war and all its ravenges, with all that has transpired in the last century, might we well be there?

The third seal sounds to me like a great famine. Wheat prices through the roof, a days wage to pay for a measure of grain, massive world wide famine? I see no evidence of it yet, but with genetic tampering of our food supply, who knows what we might unleash.

So where are we? but more importantly, where are you?

Some of you are going, "he's gone off the deep end. I have, come join me, the living water is fine.

More Travons

A video has gone viral of a beat down that took place on a bus in Floriduh. Three black thugs attacked and mauled a white kid. One of the three fifteen year olds had been reported for attempting to sell drugs at a drop out prevention center that all four attended. The driver was unwilling to intervene. if he had attempted to, chances are he too would have gotten a royal beating.
If the driver had been armed, he could have stopped this assault. Yes, it would be more St skittles, but these jerk offs need it.
Its not the color of their skin, its the culture they grow up in. If any one tries to rise above it, he is labeled an uncle Tom. Once again, I blame Lyndon the bain Johnson. Remember people, the civil rights acts in the 50's and 60's had more wide spread support among republicans then among democrats rat bastard commies. I do not blame that legislation, I blame the grate society that created a welfare state, and destroyed the black family. The vast majority of kids in the black community are rasied in single parent homes, usually by a mom who has no time, and often no interest in raising her kid to be a productive member of society. We see the results in hte high number of blacks in prison. ITS NOT THE PENAL SYSTEM DUMMY, its the welfare state that creates this nightmare.
Whats the solution? When a factory turns out a defective product, they do a recall, and destroy the bad product then replace it with good product. We can't do that with people, but what we can do is stop them from breeding. Begin castrating all second time felons. Since a huge part of the culture is being the father of multiple kids by many women, this would be a big wake up call. BTW, I want to castrate even the white second time offenders. fair is fair, and white trash is as bad as black trash, maybe worse in some areas. After that, even if its a minor violation, band them. Put a foley catheter in, then apply a band onto their pecker. Then slice arround the head, and remove it. If htey try to save the shart, they will likely bleed to death, or get serious infection.
Yup, cruel as hell, but if we make it standard, its not unusual, and we only need to impeach one or two judges who balk.

A little morning humor


Tuesday, August 6, 2013

How to not fuck up a capital murder trial

The fatwa failure, Major Hasan is now officially on trial for his rampage at Ft Hood. The linked article points out that the military rarely executes anyone. In fact, the last execution was in 1961, and eleven of the last sixteen death sentences have been over turned. Such is life when the average liar err lawyer in hte military is fresh out of college, and took a direct comission to pay off his school. Not all of em are rank amateurs, but enough, and capital trials so rare they have no experts.
The thing here is it all happened in Texas! Yes, Texas, home of the express lane for lethal injection, or so the lame stream media would have you believe. They still take too long. The military should hand the case over to Texas and let justice be served up cold. Then, after the trial, hold a court martial, and strip him of his rank for conduct unbecoming.
If they had turned it over to Texas back when this all happened, chances are he'd have run out of appeals already, and the media might be reporting about his execution instead of a trial.
I can dream. Boy can I dream. Under obungler, there is no way a mooslime will face justice. Looking for a residential pardon in late 2015.

A little morning humor


Monday, August 5, 2013

We are not arming them *cough cough*

A U.S. hellfire missle was shot at a government office in Egypt. Ok, I don't have a problem with that, except that its not our military doing the shooting, its the islamists. How in hades did they get one of our missles? We have supplied arms to Egypt for decades, is it possible that one of their storage facilities got raided?
Another possibility is that arms from Libya are flowing into the region.
What ever the case, the Obamunists need to get thier arms under control before they lecture American citizens about gun control here.
This whole mucked up mess is getting worse every day, and all obungler can do is close embassies to avoid another attack. Hey! Its not an election year, he doesn't need an October surprise. That or maybe he is finally reacting to the reports from 2012. I don't believe that, I believe he was behind the fiasco in benghazi, and that it was a fake gone sour.
Anyway, its supposed to be Fuck Obambi day at the criplets, some one dropped the ball. At least they have Fuck islam Day back up and running, sorta.

Question


What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?

Sunday, August 4, 2013

The next St Skittles

This one is in New York, and instead of a neighborhood watch captain, he met his Waterloo via the NYPD. No mention of race in the article, but with a name like Shaaliver and an aunt named Quwana, you can bet they aint Irish.
Like St Skittles, this thug has a history with the law. He's been charged with attempted murder, and a slew of other crimes.
I'll make a few predictions, broken home, welfare mom, extended family will be mostly female. He is a typical product of Johnson's Grate Society. Err great, yea, Great.
Douse met his end when he shot in the general direction of two cops. How does a fourteen year old get a gun? In New York? He had fired three shots at some men in front of a bodega. Don't know if they were criminals, but they weren't armed, so there is a chance they were not.
OK, too much guess work. If this happened in Chicago, would it make the News?  If his intended victims had killed him, would it even rate page sixteen? Assuming they were not white? Frankly, I'm shocked it made it to the news, except the lamestream media wants another race bait inflamatory story.
Its time we admit that Congress screwed up. Its not gonna be easy to fix, but if we really give one tiny bitt of a shit about the kids, we will do every thing possible to keep them in homes with a mother and a father. If not, we are dooming the black society to a never ending stream of sorrow.

A little morning humor

I asked a girl out to the prom. 
I go to a tailor to get a new suit - there was a long line.
Next, I went to a limo service to rent a limo- there was an even longer line there. Next, I went to a flower shop to get the girl a batch of roses before picking her up - there was an even longer line there.
I pick her up and we go to the prom, there is a line at the entrance.
We go to the photo shoot to get a photo together, there is a line there too.
We get hungry and decide to get food, there is a line there as well.
We get thirsty, and there is no punchline.

Saturday, August 3, 2013

Saturday low information voter joke

A female low information voter walks into a bar and orders two shots.
She downs the first one
"This is for the shame", and then the second one
"This is for the glory."
She then orders two more shots.
She drinks the first one "This is for the shame" and then the second one "This is for the glory."
She is about to order two more shots when the bartender stops her.
"Ma'am, I was just wondering ... what's this about shame and glory?"
"Well," she replies, "I like to do my housework naked. But when I bent over to pick something up, my Great Dane mounted me from behind."
"That must be the shame," the bartender said.
"No, that was the glory. The shame is when we got locked together and he dragged me around the front yard for thirty minutes."

Saturday blonde joke

A police officer was sitting  in traffic when he saw a blonde man drive by with 30 penguins in the back of his car. The police officer quickly pulled the man over and said, "What are you doing? You can't drive around with all these penguins. You have to take them to the zoo!" "Ok, ok," the man said.

The next day the police officer was sitting in traffic again when he saw the same man go by, still with 30 penguins in the back seat. He pulled him over and said, "Hey, I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo!" "I did," the blonde replied, "Today I'm taking them to the movies."

Friday, August 2, 2013

Should States legalize prostitution?

The argument to legalize prostitution has surfaced in light of the recent Supreme Court ruling regarding funds for AIDS testing and prevention, and a requirement to oppose prostitution.

Now, to be truthful, I’m torn on this subject.

My libertarian side says legalize it, there is no true victim unless the woman is forced into it, and we have plenty of laws regarding coersion and rape.

My Christian side says it is morally wrong, and should remain illegal.

I do oppose pimping regardless. They are the lowest form of leech, and all of them shold go to jail.

One argument for legalizing it is the additional revenue from taxing, permitting, mandatory STD testing etc, but do we need more governmetn in our lives? Oh Hell NO!

We allow women to dance nude or scantilly clad. Ts is also legal to perform sex for money in FRONT of a camera, so if the camerman is absent, whats the big deal?

Still, GOD says to not prostitute our daughters to whoredom lest the land be filled with prostitutes. His plan for our lives is monogamy, no changing sex partners, no one night stands. To emphasize that, he placed punishments on our lives for those who stray, namely STDs. The goal, to be clear, is a strong family with every child having a father and mother raising them. Children raised with only a mother do not develop the same as those raised with a dad in the house, even a poor father. If we are really doing things for the children, then prostitution needs to remain illegal. Maybe change penalties, punish the johns and pimps not the girls, but keep the social stigma there.

The otehr question, is if we legalize it, should consorting with a prostitute be allowed as grounds for divorce? It would be a legal activity after all.

A little morning humor

A recent study by Kansas University finds that 4 out of 5 Americans suffer from diarhea...........does that mean the 5th person actually enjoys it????????????

Thursday, August 1, 2013

A pathetic milestone

If you were expecting something about deer reader, sorry. This one is about me. I had surgery on my neck ten weeks ago to remove a disc and fuse the vertebra. Since the operation, I have had a lot of nights where I cannot sleep, and so I sit up at the computer and play games. I have played a lot of mahjong, let me tell you. Tonight I topped 400 wins in all six patterns. How disgusting is that? I need my life back.
Prior to the operation, I was told I would be back to work in six to eight weeks. That has not happened. I'm not even close. Since the surgery, the disc immediately above, and below the site have sagged. my neck tips left, then back straight. The C-4-5 nerves on the right side are mildly irritated. Prior to the surgery, I had pins and needles in both hands in the index and middle fingers. Now it is the right hand, and the ring and pinky finger, and a heck of a lot worse.
I went shooting wit ha friend last weekend. Just .22s. nothing big, I'm too chicken just yet. It was hard to get my head down on the scope.
Maybe I shouldn't have told them an Obungler joke in preop. Yes, seriously, I did. Don't remember it, but one of the residents told it back to me later, here it is;
Barry and Moochelle were sitting home one night,m maybe the only one in four years, watching TV, when a news break came on, and the talking head reported that three Brazillian  soldiers had been killed in an ambush in Afghanistan. Well, Hippo immediately burst into tears, and turned to Barry and said, that is terrible, it horrible, its time to end the fighting over there and bring the troops home. She then began sobbing uncontrolably on his shoulder.
After several minutes, she straightened up, looked him in hte eye, and said, "How many is a Brazillian?"

A little morning humor

WELCOME TO THE 21ST CENTURY !
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Our Phones ~ Wireless
*Cooking ~ Fireless
*Cars ~ Keyless
*Food ~ Fatless
*Tires ~ Tubeless
*Dress ~ Sleeveless
*Youth ~ Jobless
*Leaders ~ Shameless
*Relationships ~ Meaningless
*At titude ~ Careless
*Wives ~ Fearless
*Babies ~ Fatherless
*Feelings ~ Heartless
*Education ~ Valueless
*Children ~ Mannerless
Everything is becoming LESS
but still our hopes are ~ Endless.
In fact we are ~ Speechless
And our PRESIDENT is ~ CLUELESS