Saturday, January 24, 2015

A little morning humor

There was three guys walking down a hill a black guy, a Mexican guy, and a Chinese guy.
Then they got kidnapped by a crazy gay guy.
He said, "If all three of your dicks add up to 12 inches your lives will be spared."
The black guy pulls down his pants and he measured 6 inches,
the mexican measured 4 inches
and the the asian measured 2 inches.
Their lives got spared.

Walking down that same hill the black guy said, "You are lucky im black"
The mexican said, "You are lucky im Mexican"
Then the Chinaman said, "You are soooo lucky I had a boner".

Text Me
So I texted my friend the other day, and I asked her "What's up?"
And she says "I'm going to watch poor innocent hamsters be grilled and fried, then decapitated, and served in inconspicuous boxes to the unsuspecting public."
And I said "Oh, so you got a job at a Chinese food place. Nice."

Eye Doctor
A Chinese guy has problems with his eyes so he goes to an eye doctor.
The optometrist tests him and says "I know what the problem is you have a cateract."
The Chinese guy says "I don't have cateract I have rinconcontinantal."

Family of 5
A Chinese family of 5, named Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu decided to immigrate to the United States.

In order to get a visa, they have to Americanize their names.

Chu became Chuck.
Bu became Buck.
Hu became Huck.

Su and Fu decided to stay in China!

Teachers Assistant
A Chinese teachers assistant was teaching some college students, His thick accent affected his "Th" sound.

"What is one turd plus one turd?" He asked, Trying to say "Third".

"A pile of shit!" Replied a student.

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