Iowa land of the brave

Or maybe the stupid. Either way, this took some serious balls.
First some back ground. ObamAA+ promised the most transparent government ever. So far, all we see is a thin skinned hatemonger. This week he is stumping in Iowa,and Wednesday they were in Davenport, home of Ross Murty, and his deli was the site of the pressers lunch for the propaghanda arm who accompany Teh Won.
Ross put it on the line, and made it clear to every one where he stands and just what he believes in. His "Government didn't build my business, I DID" shirt did not garner any printable comments from Mr transparents crew of fools. Too bad Joe wasn't there, we'd have gotten a load of dumb. Then again, maybe they did, and the press, always favoring the communists, is covering for them.
Anyway, great job Ross, and prepare for your proctology exam. They will be looking at everything including your sinuses when they do it.
Too bad Denny does not have a hero's segment to go with his ObamAA+ asshole of the week award.

The Bar

Four retired men are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona. They turn a corner and see a sign that says OLD TIMERS BAR - ALL DRINKS 10 CENTS . They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true.

The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you! What'll it be, gentlemen?"

There's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a martini. In no time the bartender serves up four iced martinis shaken, not stirred, and says, "That'll be 10 cents each, please."

The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other. They can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.

Again four excellent martinis are produced, with the bartender again saying, "That's 40 cents, please."

They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them. They've each had two martinis and haven't event spent $1 yet.

Finally, one of the men asks, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"

The bartender says, "I'm a retired tailor from Phoenix and always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the lottery jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this place. Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer...it's all the same."
"Wow! That's some story!" says one of the men.

As the four men sip their martinis, they can't help noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don't have any drinks in front of them and haven't ordered anything the whole time they've been there.

Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the bartender, "What's with them?"

The bartender says...

"They're retired democrats from Chicago. They're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price..."

Lets just make it legal...spit

Well, all the BS about legalizing and taxing pot is just that, Bull Shit. A Colorado dispensary is under indictment for illegal distribution of medical marijuana. No big suprise, we knew that was coming. The big news, and no suprise either, is that they are cheating on their taxes.
Yup, legalize it, and tax it. get a clue liberals, crooks are crooks.
I personally don't care if people smoke it. The war on drugs is a scam in my opinion. I see major problems with meth, crack, and other drugs. They tend to bring crime with them. I could care less if some one wants to ruin their health and life. I do care when they turn into thieves. I worked for what I have, unlike the average liberal. For my two cents, legalize it, tax it, punish the people who cheat, and stop importation. All importation.
Kudos to Colorado for working to do it right.

some more

A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person.

The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person.

The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican's pocket and got out twenty dollars. He kept $15 for administrative fees and gave the homeless person five.

Question

What if you woke up this morning with only the things you gave GOD thanks for yesterday?

A few more laffs

A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum." The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech. "And what if I swallow it?" "No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."

One day a redneck husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted back to his wife, "What setting do I set the washing machine on?" ...
"It depends," She replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "Atlanta Braves."...


President BARACK OBAMA was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nation two weeks ago in upstate New York ..
He spoke for almost an hour about his plans for increasing every Native American's present
standard of living. He referred to his time as a U.S. Senator and how he had voted for every Native American issue that came to the floor of the Senate.
Although President Obama was vague about the details of his plans, he seemed most enthusiastic and spoke eloquently about his ideas for helping his, "Red sisters and brothers".
At the conclusion of his speech, the Tribes presented Obama with a plaque inscribed with his new Indian name, "Walking Eagle".
The proud President Obama accepted the plaque and then departed in his motorcade to a fundraiser, waving to the crowds.
A news reporter later asked the group of chiefs how they came to select the new name they had
given to the President.
They explained that "Walking Eagle" is the name given to a bird so full of shit it can no longer fly.

An Egyptian man is walking through the Cairo bazaar, when a stranger comes up to him and offers to sell Viagra (illegal in Egypt) for 100 Egyptian pounds.
"No, not worth it!"
"OK, how about 50 Egyptian pounds?"
"No, not worth it!"
"OK, 20?"
"No, not worth it!"
"How about 10?"
"No, not worth it!"
"Listen, these pills cost US $10 each. How can you say they are not worth it?"
"Oh, the pills ARE worth it. My wife is not worth it."

Just for laffs

Yup, I got called a racist again because I so do not support communism in any form.