What's Under My Hat

What's Under My Hat
Monte Tucker
February 14, 2011

Howdy friends and neighbors, did you get thawed out? Dude and dudettes, my place isn't geared for thirty-five below zero wind chills!!! Stuff froze up around my place! It was so cold I had frost-free hydrants freeze. It was so cold my cows were giving ice-cream! I've said it before but I'll say it again because I like it, it was so cold Al Gore was burning tires! HA! But this one is true; it was so cold I actually saw it with my own eyes, most of the oil field shut down! They were totally frozen up. That was a first for me.

Well I guess there is a little ruckus going on in Egypt. Folks, I really try not to listen to any major media but when it is on every hour on the hour you can't help but be hit with it now and then. I'm not sure what is happening over there but it sounds like a few folks got fed up with the government and decided to have a little protest. Again, I have no clue who's right or wrong and guess I don't care but this ABC radio news broadcaster was so excited that some head duck over there flew the coop that she was about to pee her pants because she was SO excited. Well, if the bobble-head, liberal, think-less media is excited about it, then it must be bad. Again, it was bad timing on a hay bale delivery and I was unable to change the radio station when the news screeched in and again the news reporter sounded like a cheerleader doing cart-wheels and shaking pom-poms for this so called victory for democracy between the great pyramids.

Now once again, I'm just a dumb cowboy on the north slope of Alaska, no wait, in Sunny Point, Oklahoma that whispers to cattle for a living but was it not just last summer that a bunch of freedom loving crazy Americans who deeply believed in true democracy, the Bible and the Constitution got together across this nation and held some peaceful protests against an out of control government and this same mega-media called them Tea-baggers? Well, they called them lots of bad things and I didn't see any pom-poms at all.

No, in this country if anyone dares to question our leaders the media is out to destroy them. But instead of a military take over like in Egypt we had some mid-term elections and over-threw a leadership. Don't believe me? Ask ol' sister Pelosi! That wicked witch from the west is back in the minority! You and I both know that if this so called "health care bill" doesn't get shot down by the courts and if congress keeps spending like congress and millions of Americans protest our leaders and judges the media would lose their minds over how bad it was. The tone wouldn't be that of a high school cheerleader but that of a serious professor. "Today all over the United States millions of very angry, Bible and gun carrying protestors held their defenseless elected officials captive and actually made them read an extreme list of demands once called the "Constitution." "Yes Marie, it was a grueling site! One protestor actually said he would use the force of his vote to over throw this current government!" "Yes yes, that is why this current bill being debated must pass so we can see what it says about outlawing elections!"

Folks that is why I hate listening to or watching the news! Then I have to go and write about it and stir up the pot again.

I'm Monte Tucker and that is what's under my thawed out hat!

Used with permission. Thanks to Monte and Danielle
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