September is going to see a record number of births in Hawaii as residents today went into absolute panic about a false report of inbound ballistic missiles. Many residents, believing the end was upon them opted for one last quickie, and since tomorrow was canceled, left the condoms in the drawer.
The best pick up line for fifteen minutes was, "excuse me, I've never been with a man/woman before, and I'd kinda like to know what sex is really like before I get turned to a crispy critter."
Clinics throughout Honolulu are reporting exaustion of supplies of morning after pills, and stocks from the mainland will not be delivered until Tuesday, too late to be of any benefit.
To quote the late Bob Grant: It's sick and getting sicker!
10 minutes ago
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